Challenges

There are a lot of challenges when you come back to your faith after a long time. Some of those challenges involve changing behaviors. Not using profanity isn't extremely hard, it just requires some thought. So that isn't so bad. And the hubs and I are well past our heavy drinking days. However, I am so not a patient person. Not even a little bit. Sometimes this overflows onto my family. Actually, more than sometimes. It often overflows onto them. I know from experience that sometimes "I'm sorry" just doesn't cut it in the whole, "you hurt my feelings and I will never forget it!" scheme of things. Because some things you just don't forget. So, this is hard for me. Since I don't want my kids to hate me, I am going to start looking up some stuff in my Bible, and am definitely going to pray on it. Of course, a blog needs a little more to it than that, so here's some more:

I think part of my problem has been that I have not had any time away from my family since April. I love them a lot, but a break has been needed. The hubs and I have talked about this. We were both apparently having the "want to gnaw off my leg to get out of this trap" feeling occasionally. You think, aw, it wasn't that bad was it? Yes, it was. Accept this and keep reading. So now we are working on trying to give each other a break and have each other's backs, instead of me climbing onto his back and being ugly. Like crying and picking fights, and being difficult, not necessarily in that order. In the interest of fixing this problem, tonight he got some time to chill in the office before dinner, and then he sent me to the local coffee shop after dinner. I feel amazing!

So what does this have to do with Christianity? Well, if I start searching for the tie in, I could go all, "love is patient" on you. But really, I think about Martha, and how she would get caught up in the mundane aspects of her life. She would get spun up, and then complain to Jesus, and he would basically show her what was important. (my first thought was to put, He was all like 'chill, Martha, come soak up the goodness' but I thought that might be sacrilegious, I'm not sure). So....I will enjoy this break my husband has gifted me. I will try to be more patient, and I will keep on trying to soak up the goodness Jesus has given us, and not be so bogged down in the pissy world I keep in my head.